Tuesday, Nov. 30, 2004 - 7:46 p.m.

6:23 p.m. While sitting at my desk I slowly felt myself ascending from my Aeron Chair, designed by Bill Stumpt and Don Chadwick. At first I was somewhat confused but that quickly gave way to annoyance as I lofted above my award-winning apotheosis of ergonomic seating. It�s not that I have anything against floating about the room its just that my new chair purchase was conceived to conform not only to different human shapes and weights but also to movement. Yet here I am hovering high above the breakthrough chair with pioneering tilting capacity enabling the Aeron to smoothly move with me from a forward tilt (when I reach for a singular wrapped candy) to a backward recline (while I contemplate life).

6:25 p.m. With curled fist I curse God, �Why me?� As I swim through the air attempting to return to the chairs web upholstery, which is yet another innovation both in concept and comfort, I wonder if God can even begin to understand my plight. I was comfortable in the chair. I was happy in the chair. I was at my best in the chair. After all, it evenly distributes my weight over the seat and back and permits air circulation! As for durability, don�t get me started; it will look like new long after I graduate.

6:29 p.m. In addition to making a mental note to purchase a feather duster with extendable arm I pine for the lumbar support I enjoyed only moments ago as I sat peacefully in a chair that surpassed all California fire flammability standards.

6:32 p.m. Finally my transcendence comes to an end and I ever so gently return my buttocks to the style and pleasurable contentment that they had grown accustomed to nestled in my Aeron Chair.

6:33 p.m. �My Aeron chair,� there are no sweeter words*.

* �free cake� and �wanna blow job� not included

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