Friday, Apr. 04, 2003 - 4:36 p.m.

3:51 p.m. When I returned to my office from a quick trip to the Xerox machine I found The Boss resting comfortably on my sofa. He seemed to be lost in thought, which gave me way too much time to wonder as to the nature of today�s lecture. Finally he snaps out of his coma-like state and barks:

The Boss: Garloo, why do you wear your shirt like that? Is it a statement?

Garloo: No, it�s a Brooks Brothers.

The Boss: You know what I mean.

Garloo: No, what do you mean?

The Boss: Why do you have it buttoned that way?

Garloo: What are you talking about?

The Boss: You look like a liberal. Button one more button.

Garloo: Okay. Now what do I look like?

The Boss: You know the gradation?

Garloo: There�s a button gradation?

The Boss: Why yes of course.

Garloo: And it is?

The Boss: Completely button you�re a nerd. One unbuttoned means you�re conservative. Two unbuttoned you�re a liberal. Three Euro-trash. Four white-trash.

Garloo: Wow, you�ve put some thought into this.

The Boss: Nonsense, I�ve put no thought into it whatsoever. It�s simply a tool one can use to assess others.

Garloo: Well thank you for the tutorial.

The Boss: Don�t mention it.

Garloo: That I can�t promise.

�

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